Pizza and chocolate--health foods?

Isn't it fabulous how healthful junky foods (or "indulgences," as they're termed in the trade) are becoming? Recently, some samples of Hershey's Antioxidant Milk Chocolate showed up at our office. Never mind that sugar is the first listed ingredient: These things are laced with natural flavanols! They're good for us! We hear that another American staple is soon to be rejiggered: A cholesterol-lowering pizza is in the works. Both dough and cheese of the patent-pending are impregnated with plant sterols, creating a pizza that will theoretically lower blood levels of LDL, or bad, cholesterol. "I believe Heart Healthy RoadPizza is the perfect vehicle to help lower cholesterol," says the pizza's inventor, Ira Scott, in a press release. "Chocolate and pizza are two foods that are fine just the way they are," comments a colleague. "No one should be messing with them." — Rosie Mestel